But I want cake

Yesterday was a hard day for Jacob. He wanted cake and mom said no. He really wanted cake and mom said no. He threw himself all over the floor and mom still said no. Mom finally thought that she had gotten it into his head that after lunch he could have cake. It was just 8:45 in the morning. (he just may have seen mom eat a piece of cake for breakfast, but that is entirely beside the point)
Mom goes down to the laundry room to fold laundry and Jacob follows. A few minutes later he heads back up to the kitchen. Mom hears a REALLY large knife being pulled out of the knife holder and rushes up the stairs. Mom crashes into a locked laundry room door. Mom is set on breaking down the door to get out and the door miraculously opens with a very scared little boy trying to weasel his way out of a whipping with sweet cries of, "I sorry mommy, I so sorry." The cake already had large cuts all in it.
I was asked one day by a friend who came to our house why I had a super industrial baby proof gate leading into my kitchen. Did I not like my children in there while I cooked? Was it my sanctuary? No, it is to keep Jacob from sitting on top of the fridge, keep him from eating 10 vitamins in one setting, playing with sharp objects like butcher knifes, sitting on top of the stove while turning the eyes on, putting silverware in the microwave, pouring gallons of milk on the floor, and eating every piece of ham out of the fridge. (all true by the way)
You know how parents tell their children they hope that they have children just like themselves so they can see the misery they put their parents thru? I wouldn't wish that on Jacob's wife for the world.